Helping Children Cope with Trauma and Loss
From The Berry Collective Psychologist, Dr. Stacey Berry
At times, children may lose someone or something that is important to them. They could lose their house in a fire or a family member could die. Children may also experience psychological trauma, which involves an experience which is deeply distressing and disturbing to the child. Some losses can be traumatic, such as witnessing a parent being killed in a car accident.
Depending on their age, children react differently to trauma and loss. Some children may withdraw, cry or become irritable, while others may complain of nightmares, flashbacks or difficulty concentrating in school. Magical thinking - where the child thinks that they are somehow responsible for what happened - can also occur. During difficult times children usually look to their parents for guidance.
Below are some guidelines on how to help your child process a difficult experience involving trauma or loss:
Gently explain the facts of the event to your child without using euphemisms - words like “dead” or “died” may be used if applicable. Confirm that your child understands your explanation of what physically happened as well as the family’s religious beliefs (if relevant).
Reassure your child that they are not responsible for what happened.
Let your child know that it is okay to show their feelings - crying can help them feel better.
Comfort them throughout the process of healing, but also allow them their own space.
Demonstrate your positive coping skills to your child. Children tend to mirror their parents’ behaviour.
Create opportunities for your child to express their feelings through ways other than talking, such as play, physical exercise or creative activities.
Inform your child’s teachers about what happened - they can ensure that your child is supported at school as well.
If you are worried that your child is having trouble coping you can consult a professional to provide you and your child with support.
We can help.
Here at Berry Collective Psychology, we have a dedicated team that can help support you on your journey of healing and recovery.
