Playing for Healthy Emotional Development
by Shirah Shulman
Have you ever wondered about the best way to play with your child? It is ideal if we can play in a way that helps our child express their emotions, feel validated, and find their own resources and solutions.
When children play they often enact their experiences, thoughts and feelings. Through play, a child learns how to be in the world, deal with strong emotions, process difficult experiences and act in social circumstances.
During a conversation a child will sometimes be guarded or struggle to verbalise what they see, think or experience. Connecting with your child through play will enable them to share their world with you while deepening their sense of safety and connection. A sense of safety and connection, often referred to as attachment, is necessary for healthy emotional development.
Here are some tips to make your playtime with your child beneficial and healing:
1. Follow your child’s lead, let them decide what is happening in the play and don’t criticise their choices or actions.
2. Don’t be afraid to ask clarifying questions. For example, if you role play and your child gives you a specific role, ask questions about the figure if you are unsure. If your child corrects you, accept their guidance.
3. Reflect on what you see the child is doing, e.g. “I see, the cow is crossing the road”, or “Yes, the doll is sad”. Don’t offer your opinion or explain what you think is happening.
4. When you praise your child, be specific and concentrate on efforts or achievements. e.g. Instead of saying, “You’re such a good/clever/big boy”, say: “You built such a tall tower with the blocks” or “You tried to balance the cubes.”
5. When your child is not interested in continuing a game or activity, follow their lead and don’t try to convince them to complete the game.
We can help.
Here at Berry Collective Psychology, we have a dedicated team that can help support you on your journey of healing and recovery.
